THE THREE
COMPONENTS OF COMMUNICATION
On a daily basis we
work with people who have different opinions, values, beliefs, and needs than
our own. Our ability to exchange ideas with others, understand others'
perspectives, solve problems and successfully utilize the steps and processes
presented in this training will depend significantly on how effectively we are
able to communicate with others.
The act of
communicating involves verbal, nonverbal, and paraverbal components. The verbal
component refers to the content of our message‚ the choice and arrangement of
our words. The nonverbal component refers to the message we send through our
body language. The paraverbal component refers to how we say what we say - the
tone, pacing and volume of our voices.
In order to communicate
effectively, we must use all three components to do two things:
1. Send clear, concise
messages.
2. Hear and correctly
understand messages someone is sending to us.
Communication Involves Three
Components:
1. Verbal Messages -
the words we choose
2. Paraverbal Messages
- how we say the words
3. Nonverbal Messages -
our body language
These
Three Components Are Used To:
1. Send Clear, Concise
Messages
2. Receive and
Correctly Understand Messages Sent to Us.
Verbal
Messages
Our use of language has
tremendous power in the type of atmosphere that is created at the
problem-solving table. Words that are critical, blaming, judgmental or
accusatory tend to create a resistant and defensive mindset that is not
conducive to productive problem solving. On the other hand, we can choose words
that normalize the issues and problems and reduce resistance. Phrases such as
"in some districts, people may . . .", "it is not uncommon for .
. ." and "for some folks in similar situations" are examples of
this.
Sending effective
messages requires that we state our point of view as briefly and succinctly as
possible. Listening to a rambling, unorganized speaker is tedious and
discouraging - why continue to listen when there is no interchange? Lengthy
dissertations and circuitous explanations are confusing to the listener and the
message loses its concreteness, relevance, and impact. This is your opportunity
to help the listener understand YOUR perspective and point of view. Choose your
words with the intent of making your message as clear as possible, avoiding
jargon and unnecessary, tangential information.
Effective
Verbal Messages:
1. Are brief, succinct, and organized
2. Are free of jargon
3. Do not create resistance in the
listener
Nonverbal
Messages
The power of nonverbal
communication cannot be underestimated. In his book, Silent Messages, Professor
Albert Mehrabian says the messages we send through our posture, gestures,
facial expression, and spatial distance account for 55% of what is perceived
and understood by others. In fact, through our body language we are always
communicating, whether we want to or not!
You cannot not communicate.
Nonverbal messages are the primary way that we communicate
emotions:
Facial Expression: The face is perhaps the most important conveyor of emotional
information. A face can light up with enthusiasm, energy, and approval, express
confusion or boredom, and scowl with displeasure. The eyes are particularly
expressive in telegraphing joy, sadness, anger, or confusion.
Postures and Gestures:
Our body postures can
create a feeling of warm openness or cold rejection. For example, when someone
faces us, sitting quietly with hands loosely folded in the lap, a feeling of
anticipation and interest is created. A posture of arms crossed on the chest
portrays a feeling of inflexibility. The action of gathering up one's materials
and reaching for a purse signals a desire to end the conversation.
1. Account for about
55% of what is perceived and understood by others.
2. Are conveyed through
our facial expressions as well as our postures and gestures.
Paraverbal
communication refers to the messages that we transmit through the tone, pitch,
and pacing of our voices. It is how we say something, not what we say.
Professor Mehrabian states that the paraverbal message accounts for
approximately 38% of what is communicated to someone. A sentence can convey
entirely different meanings depending on the emphasis on words and the tone of
voice. For example, the statement, "I didn't say you were stupid" has
six different meanings, depending on which word is emphasized.
Some
points to remember about our paraverbal communication:
When we are angry or excited, our speech
tends to become more rapid and higher pitched.
When we are bored or feeling down, our
speech tends to slow and take on a monotone quality.
When we are feeling defensive, our speech
is often abrupt.
Paraverbal
Messages:
1. Account for about 38% of what is
perceived and understood by others.
2. Include the tone, pitch, and
pacing of our voice
The
Importance of Consistency
In all of our
communications we want to strive to send consistent verbal, paraverbal and
nonverbal messages. When our messages are inconsistent, the listener may become
confused. Inconsistency can also create a lack of trust and undermine the
chance to build a good working relationship.
When a person sends a
message with conflicting verbal, paraverbal and nonverbal information, the
nonverbal information tends to be believed. Consider the example of someone,
through a clenched jaw, hard eyes, and steely voice, telling you they're not
mad. Which are you likely to believe? What you see or what you hear?
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